


Fly

by skyeprints



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Angst, Depression, Fluff, Human Bill Cipher, M/M, Romance, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-13
Updated: 2016-01-13
Packaged: 2018-05-13 18:44:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5713087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skyeprints/pseuds/skyeprints
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bill lost during the apocalypse, and he's been locked into a human form for a while now. <br/>Despite living comfortably with the Pines all these years, he can't find a reason to live in a fleshbag. <br/>So he decides to not do it anymore, but Dipper discovers him before he can destroy his human body. <br/>Will Dipper be able to talk Bill down? Or will Bill refuse to listen? Angst and Fluff and hopefully a happy ending</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fly

**Author's Note:**

> This oneshot follows my headcannon that Bill was sealed into a human body in order to stop him from wrecking the world. Then was kept in Gravity Falls, under the safe watch of Stanford and Stanley.
> 
> This also has suicidal thoughts/ actions... so if that triggers you, don't read it.  
> ANYWAY enjoy!~  
> Tell me what you think <3

“Just step away from the edge.” The voice sent another shock of annoyance through the demon as he stared down at the old rickety train bridge below him. Harsh wind chased away the warmth of the dwindling sunlight. From this position up on the cliff, Bill could see all of Gravity Falls. From the setting sun on the far horizon, to the tiny toy-like cars and buildings of the idiotic town below, it was all laid out beneath him. Used to, he didn’t have to be standing on the edge of a deadly drop to see everything. Used to, with all of his powers, he could see it all in a manner of seconds. 

“And why should I?” Bill spat back, turning his head to glare at Dipper behind him. “Why the hell should I?” Anger burned away in his chest. It felt good to be angry. It ate away at the hollow sensation that he normally felt in this fleshbag. This fucking curse of a fleshbag. 

“B-Because.. you could get hurt.” The brunet’s face contorted a bit, hesitating, and his eyes shifted as he thought. First they met Cipher’s, then down to the ground, then back up as he finished his sentence. His voice cracked a bit, not from puberty Bill suspected. The kid went through that a few years ago, and was definitely done by 19. It had to be from that weird emotional bullshit.

“That’s the idea Pinetree.” The former demon ground out, quickly turning away and staring back down at the steep drop just a step away. His hands clenched at his sides, and then he flexed his tan fingers, crossing his arms over his chest. The yellow ‘Mystery Shack’ shirt he was wearing fluttered a bit as more wind kissed his sun dusted cheeks. In this form, many of Mabel’s friends had called him ‘handsome’. In this form he was strong, athletic, a Mystery Shack employee, and pathetically human. Mostly human anyway. But more importantly, he couldn’t touch the Mindscape. He couldn’t talk to his friends. He couldn’t be… Bill Cipher.. anymore. He couldn’t be himself. He had lost his beautiful triangle form. Now he was weak. Just a weak, pathetic, disgusting fleshbag. 

“What are you talking about?” Dirt shifted and crunched from behind Cipher as he figured Dipper moved closer to him. A robin fluttered up above his head and flew to a tree at Bill’s far left. Gods he missed flying. Not dealing with shoes and stupid socks and blisters. Walking was such a pain. 

The blonde bristled a bit at the question, digging his nails into his arms “How the hell did you find me anyway?” He turned so that he could face Dipper fully. Mostly he wanted to be able to keep the boy from getting too close. 

Dipper pressed his lips together and clenched the strap of a bag he was carrying in his hand. “I followed you. You’ve been so weird lately, Ford wanted me to make sure you weren’t…”

“That I wasn’t up to anything.” Bill practically growled, jaw clenching as he fumed. His face contorted a bit, eyebrows coming together, golden eyes narrowed “Like I could honestly do anything in this form. I’m practically helpless like this! And he still has the fucking audacity to send you of all people to follow me!” His hands swung a bit as he spoke, making Dipper’s caramel eyes turn into saucers. 

“Then what are you doing..?” The brunet chewed on his bottom lip, right hand clenching and unclenching the bag strap near the top, left tucked into his threadbare dark blue hoodie. It was such an ugly beaten grey backpack with stickers and sharpie all over it that Bill didn’t understand why the human carried it. He supposed Dipper didn’t care for change too much, which would explain the faded blue cap on top of his head.

“Contemplating jumping.” Bill stated dryly, and honestly. His anger didn’t leave much room for coy statements or twisted words. He ran a hand through his blonde hair, pushing it back off his face, out of his eyes.

Silence hung heavy in the air for a moment. The air was getting chilly as the trees discarded more and more fall painted leaves. The demon supposed Dipper was waiting for the punch line, but as more time passed and none came, the brunet’s face slowly turned grey. “You’re serious..” He finally whispered, voice full of more ridiculous emotion. 

Bill gave a small shrug “Think about it kid.. what is there left for me now?” A small dose of honesty felt a little nice. If he was going to take the couple steps back off the cliff, why not? There wasn’t much of a reason not to be. Who better than Pinetree anyway? “I’m stuck in this fleshbag. For however many years. Stuck underneath the unbearable scrutiny of your goddamned Uncles. Working in that joke of a tourist trap. All of my goals are gone. I lost. I fucking lost and now I’m getting my ‘deserved’ punishment. Well fuck that. I’m not going to play this stupid game anymore.” He took a decided step back, his heel hovering in the air now. 

Dipper’s hands shot up and he went to take a step forward, but Bill held up a hand, making him stop. “Wait! Wait.. just think about this. If you do that, you won’t come back. You’ll be gone. And we don’t know what will happen if you die. This isn’t like when you kill a host body. You won’t just come back out.” 

“I know that!!!” Bill’s shout echoed against the trees. It made a visible shiver go down Dipper’s spine. “I don’t care.” He added, softer, but just as powerful. “I couldn’t care less.” The former demon slid his right foot back, meeting his left at the edge of the cliff. The blonde just had to lean back. Just lean back and fall. It was that easy now. 

Horror filled the younger teen’s face as he stretched out a hand “Bill please.. Don’t do this. It isn’t so bad here that you have to be this.. extreme.” His eyes were actually filling with tears. Dipper’s teeth chewed on his bottom lip as he took a hesitant step forward. The gravel crunched under his beat up black and white converse. 

“How the hell do you think you know that?” The blonde growled “You don’t know what it’s like to lose everything. To be forced into a body that isn’t yours. To be reduced to a pathetic, ridiculous form. To have everyone laugh at you, and mock you.” Anger bit the edges of every word, and Bill parted his arms as if to welcome Dipper into a hug… but that wasn’t what he had in mind “I don’t care what happens to me. Anything is better than this pointless existence.” Tears were rolling down the brunet’s cheeks now. Crying was such a useless, idiotic action. Bill didn’t understand it, used to he enjoyed making others cry. Now, though, it made his stomach twist painfully to see Pinetree cry. It turned his mouth sour, but he tried to ignore it. 

Tilting his head back, Bill’s golden eyes stared up at the violet sky. Clouds floated into his line of vision as he tipped back. Nothing caught him. His heels and legs met air. The stupid pattering organ in his chest leapt up into his throat as air caused his blonde hair to flutter up in his face. Icy wind bit his tan skin, goosebumps filled his skin. Bill’s long body skewed and his feet lifted above his head as he fell. Wind roared in his ears and tugged at his black jeans and yellow shirt. His body flipped and he stared down at the wooden train track. It was rapidly getting closer, he would probably smack against that before falling further into the gorge.  
The former demon thought about screaming.  
But then he simply pressed his lips into a small smile and his tired, haunted eyes fell closed.  
For a second, it felt like he was flying again.

Then he felt something grab his wrist. Hard. And jerk him up, then a strong arm wrapped around his waist and he gagged when the impact of being yanked to a sharp stop knocked all of the air out of him. It felt like his ribs had dug into his spine and Bill’s eyes flashed open in surprise. The bridge hung just a foot or so underneath him, and his feet now dangled towards it. So close… he had been so close.

“Wh-What the fuck??!” He gasped, turning his head and narrowing his slicing eyes on none other than Dipper Pines. His wrist ached and he clawed at the arm around his waist, hoping to rip up the skin beneath the dark blue hoodie.

Dipper’s cheeks were flushed, his hair tussled. His breath was rapid as his arms trembled at supporting them both. The rope of the grappling hook was taunt, but Dipper pushed a button with a tiny ‘click’ and they were slowly lowered down to the bridge. “Y-You’re such an idiot..” The brunet muttered, grimacing a little. Bill could see that Dipper was struggling to keep his grip on the handle of the grappling hook. It didn’t seem the brunet even noticed the demon’s thrashing.

“You could have died!!!” Bill hissed, his feet hitting the planks of the bridge. “You really just saved me with a rickety old grappling hook?!?” He planned to just jump from the edge of the railroad bridge, but instead of giving him the chance, Dipper retracted his grappling hook and tightened his grip on the blonde’s waist. It pissed Bill off to no end that Dipper risked his own life to stop the demon from throwing his own away. 

“Same one Mabel used to save me when I was 12..” The younger man stated quietly, using one hand to put it back in his beat up bag before shouldering it again. All the while he kept a grip on Bill’s waist. Despite the blonde being taller than Dipper, the brunet had a surprisingly strong grip. As much as Bill wanted to simply shove him off and jump again.. the bridge’s planks were rickety and there was nothing to keep Dipper from falling over the edge with him. Bill didn’t want that.

“Why the hell.. did you do that? I knew you were a dumbass but that was the most idiotic thing you could have ever done kid.” The blonde spat as he glared down at Dipper. The kid wouldn’t meet his eyes, and it only irritated Bill more.

The brunet finally shifted so they faced each other, one arm moving to hold the demon’s shoulder then the other hand pulled back. In a second, Bill was surprised with a hard slap across the cheek. The blonde’s face shot to the side and his mouth fell open as the hot blossoming pain ran along his cheekbone and across his jaw. Well that was unexpected.. when did Pinetree grow a pair? Cipher’s hand went up to the side of his face, but didn’t really touch it. His golden eyes tinged with tears, and he tilted his head to the side. After a second he stared down at Dipper. It felt like he was finally, actually seeing the brunet with a clear head.

“Do you ever think of anyone but yourself?!” Dipper shouted, both of his hands fisting in the front of Bill’s shirt and shaking him a little. His brown eyes flashed, and Bill stared down at him, stunned silent. 

“P-Pinetree…”

“I’m your friend damnit! I matter too! Me, and Mabel and Pacifica and Soos! For fucks sake we care about you!! How do you think we would feel?!” 

Humans… fleshbags.. were his friends? Bill had never really thought about it. His friends were demons, other monsters like him. They were violent and loveably idiotic and partied. They belonged to another universe that the former demon couldn’t reach anymore. But.. this human… was stating something Bill couldn’t quite believe. Sure, he had spent 7 human years with the Pines family now, but he didn’t really think he was making relationships..

“You.. care? Come on kid, that’s ridiculous.. I nearly killed all of your friends and family. You don’t care about me.” Bill finally scoffed, but it was weak and his throat was dry. He tried to push off Dipper’s hands and attempted to glare down at the brunet, but it still didn’t seem as strong. It was like Dipper was putting out the fire behind Bill’s anger. 

“Yes you are an asshole. You are a jerk, and self-centered, and sarcastic, and you do shit like this that totally drives me insane!” Dipper shook Bill again, and wouldn’t let go of the front of his shirt. If the kid kept shaking him, Bill might just have to shove him over the edge…

But then Dipper stepped closer, almost forcing them to balance on one plank, and the demon could smell the sweetness of Dipper’s cologne. His annoyance died yet again. “But you’re still my friend! And there’s no way in hell I’m letting you throw away your life like this! If you would just stop focusing on yourself, you could be happy here!” 

Bill tried to scoff, tried to shake off Dipper’s words, but they rang with a bit of truth that just irritated him even more. “How the hell could you know what I’m capable of doing?!”

“Because I know you.. I know that you’re scared of accepting being here, because you think it makes you weak. I know you hate sleeping because you used to not have to. I know you like mint tea more than green tea, and you hate cherry candy.”

“Now you’re just being creepy..”

“Maybe..” Dipper gave a shaky, almost hysterical laugh, and gently released his hold on Bill’s shirt. His pale hands were almost clammy as they traced up the front of the blonde’s shirt. Then across his neck, before cupping his tan face with the cool pale hands. Bill felt his heart do a weird skip thing that made him wonder if it was malfunctioning. “I know this stuff, though.. because I-I don’t know how.. but I love you. As much as I don’t want to..” Dipper’s eyes were filling with tears again, those stupid emotions were thick in his voice as he added “But I would probably never get over it if you died..”

Bill blinked, and fell silent for a few seconds. For once he didn’t know what to say. This human, loved him? It was utterly ridiculous. But here he was, crying over him. Idiotic emotions were the cause of yet another issue…

Demons didn’t love, so there was no way Bill could feel the same for Dipper. Right? However, his body felt warm. His face tingled where Pinetree’s hands were, and when the brunet started to lean up, Bill leaned back down to meet him.

The kiss was warm, and tasted like oranges. Even though Dipper instigated it, Bill controlled it. His hands tangled in the dark roots of the brunet’s hair, and his knuckles brushed the rim of the beat up old blue hat Dipper wore. Bill brushed his teeth nipped down on Pinetree’s bottom lip and then his tongue softly soothed the bruise. The brunet’s tongue touched his own, and he felt soft tears wet his tan cheeks. Then the demon pulled back. It felt like that organ in his chest might actually explode if he didn’t. It was unnerving. Bill rested his forehead on Dipper’s and took a small breath in, eyes still closed. 

What was love anyway? Movies made it seem like fire, or a magnetic pull. Something that filled you up and left you empty when it was gone. The person you loved was on your mind 24/7. This… this felt like a comfort. Like a cozy blanket on a dreadfully cold day. Bill felt like Dipper had always been there, would always be there. His Pinetree made him really smile, made him soften up a bit, made the hollow ache go away for just a few blissful seconds. And when Dipper kissed him, just for a moment, it felt like he had been flying again.

“Let’s go home..” Bill finally whispered, voice tired and almost weak. It made his nose wrinkle up in annoyance, and then he cleared his throat. The blonde opened his eyes to meet Dipper’s and brushed back the brunet’s bangs. Then, very gently, Cipher kissed that funny birthmark, right on his forehead. 

Dipper blinked, a bright blush across his cheeks “Are you… ok?” Bringing up his hand, the brunet smeared away the tears, annoyance crossing his features.

Bill ran his long fingers down the Pinetree’s arm and gently took ahold of his hand, locking their hands together. He didn’t answer right away, because he wasn’t really sure. Finally, though, he gave a small nod “Ya.. I’m ok. Better than ok.” He smirked softly “I’ve got you don’t I?” 

A soft wind fluttered Dipper’s hat and he had to grab the edge with his hand to keep it from falling off. Another blush bloomed across his neck and ears, but a smile distracted Bill from the hilarity of that. “You do.” Dipper quietly agreed.

The last of the sunlight faded out just as the moon started to glow brighter in the sky. Lights from Gravity Falls glittered underneath them, and, for a moment, Bill thought that that stupid little town was actually, in its own quirky way, a little pretty. He felt Dipper trace his knuckles with a thumb and goosebumps covered his tan arms.

His heart malfunctioned again, and his throat tightened as the demon studied Dipper’s half smile.  
Their eyes met again, and Bill felt like he was almost weightless.  
Though the demon would never admit it…  
It was scary.  
It was thrilling, and when he found himself tilting down again, right on the edge of meeting the brunet in another kiss… It was just slight butterfly touch, that left him warm all over..  
For that second, he thought he might be able to fly again.  
Maybe there was a reason to stay in this fleshbag for a few more years…  
Because if this was love, then Bill wanted more of it.


End file.
